Yes Folks, It Is Real

My, what a sleazy business this has become.

Nice Work if you can get it

It’s hard out there for a flim-flam man. Living the lie everyday with the axe hanging overhead that your little self-dealing scam might be discovered (slim chance, this is LAUSD we are talking about here), fabricating timecards for much-delayed over budget projects, double dipping, constantly dodging conflict of interest inquiries, sucking the government tit until it runs dry, whilst trying to make it all look innocent… can be exhausting work.

Take sometime out for yourself- have a Burgie!

Fuck These Fucking Fuckers

InfoUSA we’re calling you out, motherfuckers. Why?

InfoUSA advertised lists of “Elderly Opportunity Seekers,” 3.3 million older people “looking for ways to make money,” and “Suffering Seniors,” 4.7 million people with cancer or Alzheimer’s disease. “Oldies but Goodies” contained 500,000 gamblers over 55 years old, for 8.5 cents apiece. One list said: “These people are gullible. They want to believe that their luck can change.”

Sniff sniff. Sniff sniff. Nah, doesn’t pass the smell test with me. How about you?

InfoUSA, there is something seriously wrong with your business model.

This is yet another country that has taken out a contract on Americans.

Peak Oil Bullshit

After the jump (below) you will find a Youtube capture of a CNBC report from an episode of Kudlow and (yawn) Company. It is interestingTViewing for those of us who enjoy a good (or in this case, bad) spin.

The two “experts” presented here are Matt Simmons and John Kilduff.

First thing you notice is the pace. It’s at fever pitch, having an immediacy that places this topic as the most immediate threat facing “the American Way of Life(tm)”.

The second thing is, it’s very much like a new pitch for war.

“We are basically held hostage by countries that aren’t that friendly to us in terms of owning most of the oil that’s out there.” -John Kilduff

sniff sniff: smells like bullshit.

Sounds like bullshit.

Must be bullshit.

Simmons seems the more grounded of the two.

“I know most of the people pretty well now, I didn’t five years ago, that are at the fore front of the Peak Oil discussion… and I don’t think a single one of them has a political agenda. I know I certianly don’t.” -Matt Simmons

Well, at least he doesn’t call for out and out war.

The basic fact that gets glossed over here is the GAO report and how/who influenced it.

Why does it contradict the US Geological Survey, which sees no shortage of oil. (There isn’t.) What’s more, the USGS also says we’ve used about 18% of the world’s know reserves to date.

I think these fuckers just have an itch to start bombing somebody- now. Who? Whoever is eating into “their” profits, obviously.

America: if you are wondering why the rest of the world mistrusts us so much, look to your “leaders,” and who influences (corrupts) them.

Anyway, the full travesty (video) after the jump.

She’s Got Your Sour Grapes Right Here

Shaha Ali Riza wants you to feel her pain.

She’s a woman done wrong.

There can be no doubt she’s furious about how she has been treated by the World Bank — being forced to take a leave, staying on the bank’s hideously cushy payroll, and having to endure enormous pay raises and promotions — all because Wolfowitz wanted to be head of the bank.

She should write a country song!

After all, being the fuck toy of Paul Wolfowitz’s (allegedly- is it possible they don’t actually do it?) can’t be good for your standing in the world, now that we know who you are.

“Or maybe,” she continued, “I was wondering, maybe because they’re married, they’re seeing that their relationships are asexual. But because I’m dating, there must be sex there.”

Her inablity to understand what conflict of interest means is understandable, given that she’s sucked off the government tit for many years now (and Shaha Ali Riza is not even a U.S. citizen).

Everyone in Washington sucks you know, and it’s just part of life in the city of the federal government. Isn’t that the normal state of things?

“This conflict of interest thing, it’s about ethics, right?” is oft overheard in that city, at many levels, from the doorman to the highest office at the end of the corridor of power.

It is often followed by “Well, ethics ain’t the law.” Then followed by “har-de-har-har.”

But yes Virginia Shaha Ali Riza, sometimes ethics trumps the law.

And so it is written, all good scams must come to an end.

I guess the fabulous raise (Riza made more than Secretary of State Rice upon her soft landing at the State Dept.) and the wonderful placement working for that beneficiary of nepotism herself, Liz Cheney, were not enough for a Sour Grapes Poster Child with a sense of entitlement. Still, Fuck Toy Shaha Ali Riza wants to know why some people can get away with it and others can’t.

Go on, tell her, Liz.

Shaha Ali Riza arrogance might explain her anger. Shed no tears for her though, she’s still safely ensconced in the nursery known as Washington, sucking, sucking away.

There, there, don’t cry, Shaha Ali Riza, it’s all better now.

It is Like Tammany Hall all over again.

You remember Tammany Hall, right? (Click the link if you snored away during history class.) In the role of Boss Tweed, now called Boss Hogg, we have Dick Cheney, the one true president(tm).

This latest joke, if you haven’t following the political appointment of unqualified individuals this adminstration sees as fit, such as Brownie, Wolfy, Gonzo, Bolton, Miers, Rummy, goody-Goodling or any other graduate of ”Regent University” then go fuck yourself you’re a waste of space, makes this government (of the government, for the government, fuck the people) it is starting to look like deja vu all over again.

We’ll need 1000 Thomas Nasts to puncture this overbloated bag of puss.

Instead of grifters, con artsists, and associated feral ass lickers holding out their fingers-less gloved, shit-smeared hands, today we have people from the local discerning Republican xtian club holding out their fingers-less gloved, shit-smeared hands.

They might clooak themselves in some ideological bullshit, but don’t be fooled, it’s the same  difference. It all comes down to greed.

“I confess to being less than perfect when it comes to long-term personal record keeping.”

It’s like our their country has been taken over by organized crime and their goons, or worse, frat boy B students who watched Godfather and Scarface and got daddy involved in keeping them from fulfilling their duties.

UPDATE
These fucktards seem to have loyalty and royalty confused. Or maybe they don’t? (Requires a day pass at Salon.)

Sam, Say It Ain’t So!

ATLANTA (FOX 5) — What if you found out an American Idol contestant was lip-synching? What if the Bachelor was really married? How real is reality TV? The FOX 5 I-Team answers that question with one of America’s favorite reality shows: Flip This House. Senior I-Team reporter Dale Russell found one Atlanta developer on the show, Sam Leccima, wasn’t telling the truth about his renovations. Click video for more information.

Watch the Video at this Fox station’s site, or just below the Update (follow the jump).

UPDATE
Flip This Lawsuit -  Richard Davis of Trademark properties claims the idea for ths show was all his. More on Richard Davis here.

More on Sam Leccima here.

Good Riddance to Bad Rubbish

Looks like his God called him home unepectedly.

It’s always bugged me that I shared a birthday with this cretin.

Now I am free to enjoy it alone.

Thanks God!

Good Riddance to Bad Rubbish

Boris Yeltsin died on April 23.

This is a man whose political career was pretty much defined by vodka. He loved vodka. Not since W.C Fields has a man so openly craved and enjoyed the sweet, sweet elixir of life.

One cannot help but wonder why wasn’t he ever a spokesman for Stoly? Maybe he was- in Russia, and I just never noticed?

He certianly showed everyone else the preservative qualities of alcohol.

Sure, you might shit and piss blood, suffer delerium tremens- but hey, the wonder drug alochol provides the very cure for these ailments- at least so you won’t notice (or care about) it any more.

Look at all he accomplished:

• turned democracy over to the KGB and Putin
• screwed foreign creditors
• created 11 million unemployed Russians with an ingenious pyramid scheme
• pretended to care about his people, but sold them out as easily as taking a shit
• deprived of ownership and enslaved miners under mob bosses who were given that industry
• could not have cared less about Russia’s sad-sack soldiers fighting in Chechnya, where untold tens of thousand died
• loved to paaaaar-tay

and there is so much more, as outlined in this loving obituary of his enduring legacy by Matt Taibbi.

Update
Having read in Matt Taibbi’s obit how Yetlsin’s “reforms” rewarded that country’s “ruling elite-” who I think we over here in America would label “criminals-” I am left pondering what sort of benefit the Cheney and Bush families (and their cronies) have received into their personal accounts from the looting of America’s treasury to “pay off” (reward) their friends and fuck-buddies from Skull and Bones, Halliburton, et al with our country’s wealth which they use like their personal piggy-bank. As if strealing an election, and then posturing as if you really “won,” which now gives you a “decisive” vistory and some kind of “mandate” to govern, and by rights this nation’s wealth now belongs to “you,” the ”leadership.” Personally. To “dispose” of as “you” please (re: “I’m the decider”). It’s not like this adminstration isn’t already rife with nepotism, log-rolling, and incestuous corporate patronage which frees them from any pesky fiduciary responsibility to We the People, the taxpayers, the citizens, the real America.

The USofA seems to be undergoing the same kind of “Boss Tweed Tammany-Hall” corruption (not again! what goes ’round must come ’round, eh?) and nobody in the press really seems to give a shit.

Perhaps that is why Cheney et al are so desperate to keep their man, Paal Wolfowitz, at the World Bank. He’s their “inside” man.

Just a thought.

Starting to Sound Familiar?

New Century = Enron

The firm’s comments are difficult to square with accounts from rank-and-file workers. These employees worked at five different branches that handled subprime loans all over the country. All except Hardiman spoke on condition of anonymity, citing recent e-mails from the firm telling them not to comment publicly, although the company said that is standard corporate media policy. Hardiman said she was fired for refusing to approve weak loans. Others said they left because they were pressured to pump loans through the system. A few were interviewed while they were worked at New Century but then lost their jobs after the firm filed for bankruptcy.

Luis Posada Carriles

Just like The War on Some Drugs(tm) America likes a good fight- within limits that it can lose (see Korea, Vietnam, Drugs, Iraq, etc.).

Let us introduce you to the War on Some Terrorists(tm), formerly known as the War on Terror(tm).

I suppose the rest of the world might view this dropping of charges as “a victory for all freedom-loving Cubans in the world and a validation of the American legal system,” as Mr. Carriles attorney said, who then wiped his ass with the Constitution and subsequently spat on it.

This should not look hypocritical at all to the rest of the world, even if it does. The difference: these are our  terrorists, we protect them even if they get caught entering the country illegally, and no, we do not extradite to Cuba. Or Venezuela.

Those 70-ish people he is accused of killing when that airliner blew up?

Only commies.

So nyah nyah nener nener.

A Poem

counterfeit cowboy

playing high stakes poker
his opponents see his bank is getting thinner
earlier
and now devise what it would take
to bankrupt him
he shows his hand too early – it is in his face
the best players bluff better than this!
an experienced hand at doesn’t rush in
without having a solid exit plan
what a dickhead!

Punishment or Confinement?

Sentencing Paris Hilton for a short term behind bars probably isn’t going to solve the problem here. A woman who scoffs at any kind of law because, well, a sense of entitlement, needs to serve a sentence more down-to-earth, methinks.

So I suggest that the judge be a little more creative, like the judge down heah in Alabammy who sentence a shoplifter to wear a sandwich board decrying her crime.

I AM GUILTY OF DRIVING MY CAR ON A SUSPENDED LICENSE

or

I AM GUILTY OF DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE

And pacing back in forth on Rodeo Drive might have a more desirous effect.

True.

Many gifts have been exchanged between the Bush and bin Laden families over the years. But Iraq was the greatest gift of all.

The Wolfmeister General

This latest salvo misfire in this tawdry little episode is not only representative of the typical lapse of ethics from this gang of (Re) bozos running things. It also points out what is wrong with people who are card carrying members of some self-appointed eilitist class in this country.

Doling out favors and money and juicy appointments to their fuck buddies (both literal and figurative) is simply the way they maintain a stranglehold on America.

Besides, none of these carpetbaggers could ever get elected. Because they’re fucking assholes, and honest ethical Americans recognize this and would toss the bums out- if we could.

BTW, how does a foreign national get the highest security clearance?

She must be one really great lay; or Wolfy is just plain whipped.

I’d bet on the latter.

Hey, douchebag, if you didn’t want to upset your little fuck toy by having her change jobs so you could make like a bigshot and take that post for which you were not even qualified for, maybe you should have just turned it down?

Paul Wolfowitz: the living embodiment of the Peter Principle.

More.

Operation Enduring Bases

If the United States was all about getting in and out of Iraq as quickly as the neocons said the mission could be accomplished, why is the U.S. government building for the duration? Is Iraq going to be the 51st state?

Over the past year, KBR contractors have built a small American city where about 14,000 troops are living, many hunkered down inside sturdy, wooden, air-conditioned bungalows called SEA (for Southeast Asia) huts, replicas of those used by troops in Vietnam. There’s a Burger King, a gym, the country’s biggest PX—and, of course, a separate compound for KBR workers, who handle both construction and logistical support.

And a big fuck you asshole! to Cheney, Rummy, Wolfy, Perle-drops, Condi, Colon, BillK, et al for getting us in to this fine mess. How did you sad fucks get to be in charge anyway? Only one of you was elected. (Clueless doesn’t really count, he does whatever the Dick up his ass tells him to.)

The Goon Squad is Back

They are big and bad, clad in black, and these motherfuckers will club anyone who stands in their motherfucking way. Motherfucker!