Drive a Volvo and enjoy the asshole lifestyle

To that Volvo driver that swooped past me this morning at 90 and then slammed on the brakes – Fuck You Asshole!

Spilled your fucking decaf latte too, motherfucker. Left skidmarks inside your pants too, I expect.

In the future, look farther ahead of you than that fucking soccer mom’s back hatch. That line of cars going up the hill- that’s called traffic. Slow down gradually. Not that you care, but you’ll have less of an impact on everyone else’s insurance rates if you do.

That’s not the first asswipe I’ve seen being stupid in a Volvo.

What’s up with these Swedish car driving morons? Not a day goes by I don’t see some unattentive, swerving, lane drifting, fucking asshole who happens to be driving a Volvo (Swedish for “I am retard”).

If they’re not reaching around to the backseat to slap their non-behaving kids upside the head, they’re chatting on the cell phone while taking notes and eating a chicken burrito.

It’s the worst thing Volvo ever did, selling their tin buckets as ‘safe.’ All the people that expect to have accidents, or believe an accident is inevitable, choose Volvo.

Is it any wonder junkyards are full of them?

Volvo: The choice of cunts.
Call it a Vulva.

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